Kishore Kalisipudi

iPatent

I love Apple (I guess when I say that, people think of a Technology company more than the actual fruit), you guessed it, the technology company, precisely incorporation. The first reason is that they invented a very sophisticated toy called ‘iPhone’ which has changed the way people communicate with each other. Pre-iPhone days, we used to talk over phone, now we are busy browsing and playing with ‘Apps’. The iPhone was built anyway for non-conversational purpose as the call drop rate beats my son’s mathematical capabilities.

Secondly, they recently filed law suit over HTC for violating their patents which gave me an idea for patenting my stuff. So briefly iPatent..

  1. The lane that iDrive when I commute to my office between 8:45 am and 9:00 am.
  2. The 2nd bowl in my office restroom where iNormally piss.
  3. The coffee flavor iDrink everyday at the office from the upper second bin in the pantry.
  4. The direction iLook at my monitor day in and day out in the office.
  5. iCan’t list everything in here you see, they run into millions.

Anyway, anyone who are breach of one or more of the above patents are liable for facing iLaw suits and they will be punished to the fullest extent of the law.

I also thank Apple for teaching me how to do Product upgrades, for example.

  1. iPhone
  2. iPhone 3G
  3. iPhone 3GS
  4. iPhone 3GSF (that F is the flash that they are going to include in their 4th generation iPhone).
  5. iPhone 3GSFB (you can also get an iPhone in ‘Blue’ starting from 5th generation iPhone).
  6. iPhone 3GSFB* (they thought that having too many letter might backfire their marketing campaign, so it might well be i2Phone, which means, you are allowed to make calls from now)

GOD SPEAK

I wonder myself how it would be to listening to God’s voice? And then I get the answer this morning. It sound sweet, sweet as in when Sachin hits a cover boundary, a roar like an exquisite straight drive, sublime like an backward punch to extra cover, rhythmic like an exceptionally timed flick and dominating like an fiery pull over mid-wicket.

AND GOD SPOKE TODAY!

My friends tell me (they actually taunt) that comparing Sachin to God is little overboard, he is not that great and sometimes its not right. And, personally I think they are ignorant. Did they see God anytime, do they know what he did, do they really think that God is about lifting mountains with his little finger, killing the demons with the blink of an eye, drinking an ocean full of water in one gulp and endless other mysterious and superlative deeds? Well then they got is absolutely wrong, as it proves that not only they do not know anything about God but they pretend that God exists. God is about doing right and more so with an unconditional love and nothing else.

Sachin is not great because he plays every shot in the dictionary of cricket and he scored tons of runs and milestones just feel at this feat with relative ease. He is great because he LOVE the game, he is great because he RESPECTS the game, he is great because he believes what he do is right, UNCONDITIONALLY. I am blessed to have seen him play today, not because this is one of his best knocks, not because how he approaches the game, because he made me forget for a while, what the greatest sorrow a man has, DEATH. My cousin husband’s untimely death has left me with a sorrowed heart and spending that last 4 days until they were aboard a flight to India was a lifetime experience. Her life has changed forever and there is nothing but time, that can heal the wounds and but for lending my deepest sorrows, I am humanely mortal to give her life back.

Having deep love towards the game of Cricket made me woke up today morning although my wife didn’t like the fact that I was putting myself out of rest from the last 4 days or so. I told her, I would only watch Sachin’s batting today and will go back to sleep after that. God had other plans today, he wanted me lighten up my heavy heart with his words (strokes). He wanted me to witness the truth, he wanted me to watch doing right and….I had.

Critics are ordinary humans, who paint their failures often on one’s success. But when you talk about God, you are often left with one side and one choice, YES!

Today, the God spoke and I listened.

Feeling sad

It is with great regret I let you know all that my close cousin’s husband had died in a road accident yesterday night. He was on a bicycle on his way to the university when a car hit him. Initial reports say that he might have died on the spot. My cousin with whatever little help that she is getting is still standing bold and coming up to the terms. Its takes great panache of a brave face from her when she called me last night to convey the sorrowed message to me. I salute her fortitude and can only say that I am here in need.

May God bless his soul and give  her peace and tranquility.

🙁

Unconquered

This might sound irony or a blunt weapon to invite criticism that I am an ‘unconditional’ fan of Indian Cricket Team. Taking nothing away from South Africa on their wonderful performance, I still insist that they haven’t bet the World #1 team yet. With no Dravid, Lakshman I do not think that we can even call this team a team. Minus Kallis and Amala, SA wold be a bunch of jokers, with all due respect. Me and my friend who plays his usual ‘gully’ cricket in MA, often debate over Cricket matches and he takes great pride in supporting any team playing opposite to India. Of course, he doesn’t understand Cricket a bit and his ignorance towards the game matches my younger son’s visionary over his Nintendo DS.

More than anything this is selection panel’s loss. Sehwag has proved that he can wack the same Steyn around all around the park faster than he can bowl. Paul Harris stuck to his ‘negative’ line of bowling which remembers me Steve Waugh’s down-under game with India. Wherein Amit Mishra with his orthodox action might have missed a trillion edges of SA’s batting. In plain terms, other than Steyn’s success they rode completely over luck. Kallis was almost run-out when he was on 2 and he did not had a clue what length Mishra was bowling to and their edges out weigh their total score by zillions. Again, irony it may sound, look at the way our main batsmen got out, more than the bowling it was shot selection. In a given day, Sehwag can put 11 out of 10 outside the off stump balls to boundary (you can build a china-wall, it will still pierce through). The team lost the test even before the first ball was bowled, having no choice but to pick Saha (no offenses on Saha) who never in his life have dreamt of making a debut because a stand-by got injured that morning 15 minutes before the play.

Tet match is about sessions and nothing else. Gauti might have made two consecutive erroneous decisions, but he seldom does that and Kolkata will be a perfect place to set that right. Hoping that Lakshman will come back to the game, we still miss Dravid, who at #3 places his innings with perfection. India should forget what happened at Kanpur as SA did not win that game, its India who have lost its game, right from selection time. Sreesanth and Raina have been called back to the squad (hilarious than it sounds) as it makes it no better combination. My pick would be,

  1. Gambhir
  2. Sehwag
  3. Vijay
  4. Sachin
  5. Lakshman
  6. Kohli
  7. Dhoni
  8. Harbhajan
  9. Mishra
  10. Zaheer
  11. Sreesanth

If Badrinath or Raina plays in place of Kohli, I don’t think it would make too much different and Gambhir should be 1st down while promoting Vijay to open the innings.

Dhoni is an excellent captain and he accepts his mistakes more boldly than any other captain around. He was playing with 8 instead of 11 players and I do not blame him for that. If Bhajji resorts to ‘negative’ line, I guess SA will take decades to search for the ball. Game is ON.

Federarized

While watching the Australian Open finals, something caught my eye in the midst of spectators which stamped authority on my ‘distinguished’ thoughts of Federer. Someone in the crowd had a play-card saying “New word in the dictionary – ‘Federarized’ “. How true! the word has enough implications and weight and a hard to describe patten of events. It looks so simple yet pouncing. There is certain force that comes with special words and vocalize the personality that stands behind. Game apart, the authoritative nature by which Federer has reclaimed ‘his’ title was spellbinding.

Server after serve, point after point Federer demonstrated why he is considered Open-Era’s best player, ever. I often wonder how important are these people’s contributions to the society, considering they play mostly at professional level. Do they really add quality to our lives in particular when a crown after crown is stacked in their shelves. Can we really think outside the box when what we watch is mere sport? I guess these are more of self-questionnaire than generalized queries. Irrelevant as they are, persons like Federer exemplifies success at individual level. They personify a fact and remind us what hard work and dedication yield and constantly remind us that we all serve a purpose at our own level. Federarized is more than an adjective beyond personality.

Yesterday was just a grand-slam and two individuals were trying hard to reach a goal they waited to reach so desperately over last 2 weeks. Murray may have lost, but he has more to gain than to loose as he got to witness a master-class of tennis, at a level few could even dream and was standing opposite to that legend, in awe and Federarized. It is a lesson to all of us of how important it is to follow our dream and reach it step by step.

I wait for my day to be FEDERARIZED.

Blessed I was to have seen such great personality with one racquet hitting one ball at a time.

Rediscover the Classic

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gAlquaS-Xh8&feature=player_embedded]

If there is one movie that I wish to see anytime, anywhere with anybody, I will blindly pick ‘Mayabazar’. This eternal Telugu classic is being revitalized to be released in digitally mastered color-scope with DTS sound. Since my childhood, I’ve watching countless movies in all genres and in tons of languages, but one movie which will forever remains in my heart would be ‘Mayabazar’. Never in the history of cinema, for that matter any cinema in any country would not have captured the hearts as ‘Mayabazar’. 3 generations have passed, but this eternal classic has remained in the hearts of people.

Goldstone Technologies Ltd. in Hyderabad took up this painstaking task of bringing the celluloid painted in vibrant yet period colors, shredding 3 long years in manpower and investment. Economics apart, their tribute to bring this classic to 21st century digital era is in itself is commendable in every aspect. Thanks to all those (I am so jealous that they’ve got to see this movie frame by frame numerous times) who gave steroids to our memories forever printed in our hearts and head.

Kudos and bring it on.

Why 3 Idiots?

Its been really a while since I watched a good movie. I got a chance to watch in awe, ‘3 Idiots’ along with my family. Movies with messages have always inspired me, much better when the telling is ‘earthy’. Rajkumar Hirani has unique ability on this front, his last movie “Lage Raho’ was a hearty entertainer with a message, I guess very few can even think to pursue. Well, the zealot inside me kicked in ever since I heard the movie title, but nonetheless gave any importance to it as my expectations were reserved until the release time. Anyway, after watching the movie (without reading the inspirational base, the book called ‘5 Point Someone’ by Chetan Bhagat) one thing that kicked me off was, why ‘3 Idiots’? Does that title mean that its about 3 idiots in that engineering college? Yes and No is my take. After thinking, actually listening to the songs, I found the clue to the movie title. The title is not just perfect and apt but adds icing to the cake (message). You are just as curious now as I was and the answer is.. ‘Idiot=Heart’. The story is about 3 guys, who have listened to their hearts. And where did I find the clue? Well the most buzzing number from the movie which goes “All izz well..”. Swanand Kirkire the lyricist penned brilliant lines into this easy yet memorable number from Shantanu Moitra (his last work of music was in Parineeta).

The lines in the number goes…

Dil jo tera baat baat pe
Ghabraaye
Dil pe rakh ke haath usae tu fuslaa le
Dil idiot hai pyaar se usko samjha le

and there it lies, the clue. Giving a message is not a big deal, we do that to everyone we know almost every day. Seldom are those instances where the listener really likes what you convey, and to convince people in millions is no mean feat and that is what Hirani had proved himself once again. Movies forum is mainly for entertainment, it is such time that a person would like to be relaxed and have fun, more than anything its a form of escape. What better when you get a Dollar for a Cent. Go fetch.

Wow! I wrote an OS (many times)

Ever since people started calling Apple’s Mac OS, Leopard, etc an Operating System, I wondered why is it so famous. After all I wrote so many pieces of software that works, of course only for that client and only for that environment and no where else. If writing a program that is hardware specific, software specific and device and environment specific can be called OS, I guess I wrote many.

Well, I am sure that Android will be welcomed by all those wits out there eager to write their apps that can be ‘tested’, ‘deployed’ and ‘used’ without paying to some nut-cracker. Apple’s price gouging will some day be dealt with a whip, until then, enjoy its exuberantly priced caps. By the way I heard that they are coming up with a magic wand, but it only works in persons named Panther wearing a white shirt over black trousers, gray tie and brown buckled belt. Oops! that’s still too generic I guess for Apple. The Panther should be 24 and weigh exactly 150 pounds. That’s it I guess! No one last thing, is he wearing Hush Puppies?

Over the years, the joke that Apple had played upon us was in more ways humiliating. Calling a piece of software running faster than Windows, etc which has been customized to run only on its machine is actually more than a joke. I am not a Apple hater, I hate Apple products, not for being so niche, but being so ‘close’ and they come with a billion ifs and buts. Its like selling a bulb that only works in my bedroom in broad day light, who cares!

I guess most of you can claim, “I wrote an OS”.

20

God chooses individuals to reach him not by worship but by work. Rajaji explains the similarities between ‘bhakti’ and ‘wisdom’, ‘devotion’ and ‘knowledge’ before the ‘Bhajagovindam’ rendering by the divine voice of MS. When knowledge matures and issues out in action, it transforms into ‘bhakti’. This however is human being’s finding of ultimate truth and there are few individuals who reached that peak ever. Whatever one does, if he or she can transform that into ‘bhakti’, there is not tunnel nor light after that, as they would’ve already reached that place. Personally there are only three individuals who reached that peak in their lives and proudly they are all Indian. Adi Sankara, Mahatma Gandhi and Sachin Ramesh Tendulkar. While Gandhi took long to reach that place, both Sankara and Sachin had done it relatively quickly.

I am mere mortal to write about them nor qualified enough to win an argument, but one thing is certain that my understanding of those individuals gives me utmost happiness, without prejudice or price. Today marks Sachin’s entry into the official cricket world of 20 long years. There is no other individual ever born in the history of sports to have culminated to the point of what Sachin has, and achieved what he did, and I can bet my cents that I will not see such an individual in my lifetime. There were other peers and pasts who have adored this great game of Cricket but, no one had the ‘burden’ of Sachin.

It is that ‘burden’ that makes him THE INDIVIDUAL. If an entire nation can pause when he bats, it does not show what he is capable of, but shows his dignity and respect towards the work he does. He is worshiped not because he is an outstanding cricketer but for his honesty in what he does and the intent that carries on. Superlatives merely explain a man’s personality with lots of jujitsu, however a man’s passion is what drives him closer to the goal. He is a Godly figure across the world, but he seeks God in cricket than anywhere else. It is this divine relationship with the game that made him an unique personality hardly witnessed in our world. If individuals are credited with ‘man-of-the-match’ awards for performing better than the rest in a match, there would be no other person better than Sachin, who deserves ‘man-of-the-cricket’ award to have placed the game into billions of hearts.

Many argue and will continue to argue about this great man and will find weaknesses and dis-qualifications to satisfy and subdue their personal egos, but will fail and fall to their own persona. His humility is an example of being a MAN in a herd of people and his dedication will forever hold its high in its threshold. History had always been cruel to mankind, but rare gems like Sachin glorifies the time we pass and become part of it.

If Gandhi was a symbol of ‘simple’ truth, Sachin shall forever remembered as a ‘simple’ genius of cricket. Many follow the path of God but only few step along and our generation is gifted of having such a great man in its stride.

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